A Midwinter's Rose

Weather

In the seventies nice and balmy in Florida,

where once it was in the eighties for Spring.

What is up with the warm air where did it go?

Not that I'm complaining cool air doesn't steal

the breath from my lungs and leave me to gasp.

 

 

Music

 

Voices haunting and serene.

Celtic ballads and melodies flowing like a fountain,

flooding the plains in my imagination.

My creativity returns nourished on legends and stories of old.

How i want to capture what I see in my head.

Ancient wonders long since forgotten,

return home to me.

 

 

 

 

 

It appears my loner habit wins out. That's okay I'm used to being alone.Though when it turns out that I have to find out through the freaking grapevine or stumbling or their journals that they don't consider me friends, it hurts and makes me wonder why the fuck are they even talking to me for? They take out their fustration on me and judge me by how I live but they don't do it to their other friends. When they say they don't mean to hurt my feeling but continue to do so makes me wonder why do I still keep them close. The people I still consider friends I can count on my right hand.
I haven't learned my lesson about being overly trusting even when it gets me burned. Why do I constantly seek out friends when  I know I am damn  well better at going it alone. I should just declare my self a Recluse because ovbiously some force out there think it better for me to be alone so I don't have to deal with bullshit friendships..

You guys say you know I hurt, no you don't know.  You have know idea cause I lock inside myself and pretend everything is OfreakingKay when it's not. Some of you know what it's like to feel that you are being ignored or shut out of everything. Some don't, It really fucking sucks and you find yourself re evaluating everything you ever done or are doing. You lack confidence with in yourself and are extremely senstive to everything. 

If it wasn't for those freinds I can count on my finger, The ones who truly do care and will listen that I haven't done something extrememly stupid that would deprive the world of a potential next best author. That is if I can ever find the confidence to finish my books. I thank those who have kept my head above my own raging sea of emotion periodically.

Even the hardest stone and the hardest of hearts will break if enough pressure is applied..

Well almost a full year as being catholic again. It's been a pretty good ride. Although recently I was bashed solely for being catholic and pointing out that how a person wrote on an article calling  what a grandfather did to his three year old  grand daughter and excrosism.  Seriously how many Priests do you see choke the living snot out of the possessed person?  Oh well.  Not my problem the grandfather fell to the floor dead after he was tasered  by the police only once.

I don't get why I have to be bashed for my beliefs, you don't know me probably never will. You don't know what I am like or what io have been through. So who are you to judge me? People should honestly judge themselves before they start judging others.  We all know that's probably never going to Happen.
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Enough about the personal life right now. On with the Projects. I'm currently working on several stories two fan-fiction  two  original. My creative jucies are running dry. I really need to get to those Smoky Mountains to recharge. Can't do that yet until my parents have their  personal vacay. Oh well.

My art and writting  and life seem to have taken over my posting time. I am back now though. My dad was in the hospital but he's back now so no worries. I really need to finish chapter five of my fanfic and rewrite more of  Legacy.
possibly  do more art for it as well.  That's about it from me.

I've been a wee bit busy. Dad was sick again, a double whammy of sorts. A whacked out bladder infection and a stupid cold, that I TOLD him he had and should have gone to the doctor for. Did he?  NO. He never listens to me. Oh well.


Oh and Happy belated Easter ^_^ church service was great even though I couldn't make the Easter Vigil on Saturday night.
I'm still working on stuff. for those interested in Sailormoon and otaku (fan made) senshi  I have a website.

www.silverlightcathedral.com/main.html

^_^ I turned TWENTY FIVE today man that  is a HUGE milestone for me.

Today was pretty much the same except I got my manga wallet set of copics. Yea ^_^ behold  I now have the friggin colorless blender! Woo. Now I just have to wait for my  copic marker pad and i'll be happy.  You know I really hate cold season. Well, sick, well, sick,  it's very annoying.

Got  Church on Sunday I'll fill you in on that. Got a few things going with my  art and stuff. fill in on that too.

Hrm, its 11 am, I've done a few things like getting my art community set up. Which will be  added to my website once its made. It's a place to comment on all my art original and fanbased. ^_^. Im gonna try getting chapter three  of legacy, light of hope rewritten  a.s.a.p. ^_^ .  Now its on to drawing so many art projects to do. Oh and my sister is in town. I'll let you know how that goes later. 

Well I woke up this morning at eight. Got dressed to attend Sunday mass at the Blessed Trinity Catholic church. Started coughing again. Didn't stop coughing it only died down a little. Couldn't quite hear the Sermon Father Jose gave because of the irritable coughing. I started running a fever today. No more trying to fight this crap I'm going to the doctors. Oh my God, I refuse to lose my voice before Christmas. Refuse, Refuse, Refuse. DO you all hear me?

Oh well another goal accomplished i got an Lj community started for my  fantasy story. I wonder if people will like. Like it? Hate it? I want all opinions.

EDIT:: Some one already offered. I'll keep you all informed.


Oh well. Happy Holidays, Hrm Holidays, you know. That sums up every single holiday in December. It should be Universal. Use it God won't look down on you if you do. No matter what those Fundies think.

01. Forgiveness
02. Abandoned
03. Smile
04. Innocence
05. In the Moonlight
06. Stars
07. Numb
08. Friendship
09. Hero
10. Romance
11. Pride
12. Destiny
13. Faith
14. Memories
15. Cute
16. Glitter/Shining
17. Power
18. Fight
19. Anger
20. Sadness
21. Sacrifice
22. Loneliness
23. Believe
24. Colorful
25. Secrets
26. Annoyed
27. Eyes
28. "Happy" endings
29. Pain
30. Kiss
31. Regret
32. Music/Song
33. Humor/Laughter
34. Shocking
35. Attack
36. Serenity
37. Animal
38. Enemy
39. Betrayal
40. Lost
41. Rain
42. So Close Yet So Far Away
43. Food/Sweets
44. Tears
45. Defeat
46. Darkness
47. Lightness
48. Protect
49. Black & White
50. Beauty


This was originally for a sailormoon thing but i plan on putting my own twist to it and doing some Fantasy arts from it wish me luck ^_^

Today I woke up at eight in the morning. Why so early you ask? Because I had The last Church choir Rhersal for Christmas. We were pretty good. I hope I don't loose my voice before Christmas Eve. Because that would majorly suck.

Last night my filling in my bottom tooth popped out AFTER, I had gone to the dentist eariler that day for a check up. So ya, another trip to the dentist for me. Whoop de doo.

Art wise im doing pretty good, found I style that I like, however, I may try Alphonse Mucha's style next ^_^ Should make for and intresting picture. I also find myself asking, well myself, "enadil when are you going to stop drawing Sailor senshi." I reply back, "never I am young at heart." Although I know there will be a time. When I will grow tired of it,but who knows when that will be.

Writing wise, I am on a creative high, I've rewritten to chapters of my story Legacy. I'm contemplating giving it a new title as I am already renaming the chapters. I'm also not too fond of the oufits I designed for my mages when I first started writting their story back in 02. There maybe a Costume design contest in the near future. Be on the look out.


What about tomorrow? Tomorrow I have church service at ten. I will sing, and then I will come home find something to eat, and either work on my story or pass out. It depends on which I feel like doing first.